


Your Tenderness is Paradise

by NovelistAngel23



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: (as in no contraceptives), Alternate Universe - Canon, F/M, Fem! Marco, First Time, Unsafe Sex, underage because they're trainees
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-21
Updated: 2016-04-21
Packaged: 2018-06-03 15:45:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6616288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NovelistAngel23/pseuds/NovelistAngel23
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He was overcome with the urge to kiss every part of her body, even her thighs, her breasts, the roundness of her stomach. He wanted to touch his lips to her toes, to her ankles, to the bruises of the 3DMG. He wanted to kiss her back, the shoulder blades and spine that kept her sturdy and strong. He wanted to kiss between her legs, where the warmth budded and overflowed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Your Tenderness is Paradise

“Are you sure?” Jean asked, probably for the third time.

Still Marcia wasn’t annoyed or impatient. She merely smiled and nodded and whispered yes, as she took his face between her gentle hands. Jean smiled at the warmth, kissed her back when she brought their lips together. His whole body was trembling, from nerves or arousal he wasn’t quite sure.

It was not the first time they’d snuck out of the barracks at night to make out in the supply room. Not the first time Marcia sat right there, on the table where usually they repaired their gear, or the first time he stood between her legs and let his hands touch the curve of her waist.

He could feel the muscles there, built up from training, but also the softness of her skin as he gently tugged her shirt out from where it was tucked into her night pants. She giggled a bit into the kiss when he dug his thumbs gently into her tummy. He smiled too, cheekily, and that was when she slapped his arm and pulled back.

He could see the nervousness in her eyes, even if she was the one insisting that this was more than okay. Neither of them had ever gone farther than taking off their shirts as they kissed and touched with trembling fingers. She took off her bra once, and still he remembered with a shiver how her hair cascaded down to cup her breasts in a way that made him sure she was a goddess. Holy. He almost couldn’t bring himself to touch her for fear of blasphemy.

But she smiled a little and then reached down to pull her shirt off, up and up over the softness of her skin. She only wore soft night pants after that and a bra that showed off the curvature of the top of her breasts. Jean was sure he could not breathe.

“Help with my bra?” she asked softly. He knew she didn’t need help—that she’d taken it off herself a million times before—but the question made his mouth go dry.

He leaned forward, hands touching her sides again and sliding up slowly, gently. She pressed her lips against his shoulder as she leaned in as well. Her own hands touched the hem of his shirt. He leaned back only enough for her to tug it off of him. She bit her full lips at the sight of him. Jean couldn’t imagine what she saw. He never thought too much of himself when he looked in the mirror—not buff like Reiner or particularly tall like Bert. In fact, even Marcia was a little taller than him.

But she looked up at him and grinned nonetheless. “I think you taking off your shirt is my favorite part,” she breathed, voice still trembling the slightest bit, and Jean couldn’t help but grin back.

When they kissed again, this time there was more passion than there was before. The nerves were not gone by any means, but they were starting to calm. He kissed her with lips and tongue, and she kissed back with playful nips of teeth that at first made him jolt in surprise until he realized he liked them.

He leaned forward again, his body cupping around hers. And to his surprise, when he reached up to unhook her bra, he felt her legs come up and wrap around his waist. She kissed him deeply, didn’t stop even when her bra popped open and started to fall down her arms.

Jean was sure his heart was pounding, but he couldn’t hear it over the rambling in his own brain. Her name, her skin, the feeling of her hands sliding into his hair and pulling him closer—it drowned out his other thoughts, and he found he didn’t mind.

They pulled apart a bit, and that was when Marcia grinned, the way she did when she told a dumb joke, her tongue between her teeth. Jean was mesmerized enough to not notice—at first—that she was pulling her bra down. Soon it was off, and she was bare for him to see.

She hunched her shoulders a bit, nervous. Jean kissed the corner of her lips, feeling them tremble a little bit. “Marcia,” he murmured, pressing kisses across the freckles littering her cheek. “You’re beautiful.”

Her breath stuttered as he let his kisses dribble down her neck, to her shoulders. There was a pale mark where her bra strap used to be, and beside it the dark bruise from the 3DMG. Jean kissed that mark softly, his hands still rubbing her sides.

She leaned her head down against his neck, and slowly her shoulders stopped hunching to hide herself. She kissed his neck, once, twice. “Jean…” she murmured. “Y-you can touch them if you want…”

He’d never really done so before, never been brave enough to caress them the way he does the rest of her body. But as he leaned back to look at her—at the dark, luxurious curls that made her look so much like a goddess, and the warmly tanned skin that made her glow, he realized he could worship her. Maybe she was one of the wall goddesses reincarnated.

His hands trembled where they stood on the table. “Marcia,” he whispered, “Lie down?”

She smiled at that. She’d said she was sure and hadn’t been lying. Maybe she’d never done something like this before and maybe Jean hadn’t either, but she knew who she wanted to be the first.

Him.

Carefully she lay back against the table. They knew it was sturdy, having laid down on it together before, but even so she grew more nervous as he lifted himself up and settled on top of her. His arms held him up, so his weight wasn’t completely crushing her. Still she could feel the warmth and firmness of his body over hers. It made her heart race. Her face turned red, but she smiled and reached up to wrap her own arms around his neck.

“I love you,” she whispered softly.

Perhaps it wasn’t the first time she’d said it—but with Marcia it was a common occurrence. She loved everyone, with all of the heart she had. And yet, now, here, Jean knew there was something more to this. It wasn’t the sound of her shaking her head at his hijinks. It wasn’t her laughing at his dumb jokes.

He met her eyes, his own shining in a way she’d never really seen before. “I love you too,” he replied.

Marcia grinned and pulled him down for a kiss. Her knees rose, cradling him between them, his hips against hers. As they kissed, she felt his hips twitch and felt something growing hard against her tummy. Nerves caught her again, making her tense, and yet… somehow she was also excited. Her mind raced along with her heart— _I did that, didn’t I?_ she couldn’t help but think, grinning into their kisses.

He could feel his arousal growing, felt her tense and then melt beneath him. His hands rubbed her sides until finally he grew brave enough to reach up and place one hand along the curve of her breast. He could hear her breathing start to speed up, and as gently as he could, he squeezed. She trembled, pulling away from the kiss to lean their foreheads together and breathe.

“D-did I do something—“ he began, his voice flush with nerves.

But she smiled softly and shook her head. Her legs lifted to wrap around his waist, pulling him closer. They rubbed against each other in a way that made his stomach twist in knots—but he liked it, liked feeling all knotted up and wound like those toys that sang once you finished winding.

“J-Jean,” she breathed, “Do you wanna go… farther?”

His breath caught in his throat. “A-are you sure?” he asked for probably the fourth time.

Even still she didn’t look frustrated or impatient. Her eyes merely sparkled as she nodded. “W-with you…” Her voice sounded sheepish. “I’m nervous, but I want to. I know you’ll be gentle.”

He wanted to be gentle. He wanted to be everything she deserved for a first time. He was more than willing to try, even if he had no idea what he was doing.

“O-okay,” he breathed, nodding eagerly. “L-let’s go farther.”

She giggled again and sat up a bit. She looked so excited that it made Jean feel more excited. Would it feel as good as some of the guys had told him it would? Would it be more scary than good?

But all the thoughts in his head melted away as Marcia slowly pulled down her night pants, revealing thick thighs still littered with freckles. He was sure his jaw dropped, but Marcia merely reached to pull him up and kiss him again. “D-do you want…?”

He guessed what she was asking and reached down to unbutton his own pants. A little bit of wriggling and a few laughs later, he was down to his boxers. They paused there, smiling at each other and knowing that this was what they wanted—each other.

Marcia lay back again, pulling Jean on top of her. He jolted in surprise as their hips met—through her underwear, he could feel a warm, wet spot that made his whole body shiver.

He tried to remember what he’d learned when Shadis, with enthusiasm that left something to be desired, taught the cadets about sex. He tried to remember how the other guys who’d slept with girls described it.

He kissed Marcia and then pulled back a bit, breathing in almost disbelief, “You’re turned on?”

She didn’t quite laugh, just snorted a bit. “So are you.”

He nodded slowly and she smiled. “G-guess that means we’re doing good so far?”

He couldn’t help but laugh at that. They were almost naked, and he considered that evidence enough. “S-so what now?”

She slowly shrugged. Not having gone so far before, she wasn’t exactly sure what they were supposed to do now—only that it ended with him inside of her. The thought made her shiver with anticipation, but she wasn’t sure she was quite ready to feel that yet.

“I-I guess we just t-touch?” she murmured.

The nerves were evident in her voice, and although Jean had no less idea what to do, he was ready to try.

So he kissed her first, slowly and gently, until they had both melted into it. Taking her advice, he began to touch, let his fingers trace delicately wherever he’d longed to touch. Her breasts first, tracing the curve and holding them in his palms. They were bigger than his hands, but he treated them as if they were something small and precious. He never squeezed too hard, and when his thumbs gently brushed her nipples and she let out a gasping moan, he didn’t press into them harder. He did it gently again, felt her body roll beneath him.

He started to treasure the sound of her moaning. Against his hips, he could feel the wet spot growing in her underwear. The thought that she was becoming more aroused made his head spin. He felt as if he was underwater, but he wouldn’t mind drowning. He kissed until he couldn’t breathe and then only pulled away to gasp in a breath again.

She began to let her hands trail down his back. Sweat had begun to pool in the dip of his back, slicking the path of her hands. She wanted to feel every muscle, record them to her memory. When she felt the bruises of the 3DMG, she caressed them gently, in a way that made him shudder pleasurably.

His hands left her breasts regretfully, finding their way to her thighs. They too were too big for his hands, and yet he treated them delicately. As if her body were made of precious jewels. He was overcome with the urge to kiss every part of her body, even her thighs, her breasts, the roundness of her stomach. He wanted to touch his lips to her toes, to her ankles, to the bruises of the 3DMG. He wanted to kiss her back, the shoulder blades and spine that kept her sturdy and strong. He wanted to kiss between her legs, where the warmth budded and overflowed.

So he started to. He left her lips, which parted in his absence to let out breathless little pants that made him feel heady and hot. He kissed down the length of her neck and along her freckled shoulders. At her breasts, he hesitated, not sure where to put his mouth. But he remembered the sounds she’d made when he’d traced his thumbs over her nipples and decided they were probably sensitive. Hesitantly, he placed his lips over one and began to kiss.         

She gasped, her back arching just slightly. Her hair that had cascaded down her back now splayed along the table. Tendrils of it fell off the edges of the table, and Jean thought it was just as beautiful this way, caught in the swirls of the wood.

He kissed again, and when she shivered, he reached over to brush his thumb over the other. Her body seemed to tighten, legs jolting and then trembling as he started to kiss more fully. “O-oh, Jean,” she breathed, her voice so high-pitched that it reenergized him.

He let his tongue peek out between his lips and hesitantly kitten licked her nipple. At that she moaned more fully than she had before, and the sound was loud enough that he worried someone would hear.

But at the same time, he liked the sound more than he feared it. He licked again, with more of his tongue. She tasted sweet, in a metaphorical way. Her skin was salty with sweat, but to him, there was more. The scent of her skin—sweet like flowers, because she so often washed with pressed flowers along with soap. And the way she breathed, her chest rising and falling against his searching tongue and lips. It tasted sweet to him.

He let his tongue touch her other nipple, and she made the same sounds, the same squirming movements. He held them close to his heart, knowing he’d never soon forget this moment.

But after a moment or two, he started to trail down, leaving his thumbs to tease her instead. Between her breasts and down her stomach he traveled. The swell of muscles beneath her layer of chub made him smile. He stuck his tongue into her bellybutton, and she couldn’t help but laugh at the intrusion.

“Jean, that tickles!” she complained, but her voice was soft and light with laughter.

He grinned cheekily back at her before scooting down the table more and finding himself face to face with the wet spot in her underwear. He swallowed hard, nerves coming to meet him again. He looked up and met Marcia’s gaze. Her eyes were wide, her face more pink than it had before. As their eyes met, she gasped and lay back down, covering her face with her hands. “O-oh gosh, that’s s-so embarrassing,” she stuttered from beneath her hands.

He sat up a little bit, scared that he’d done something wrong. “D-do you want me to stop?” he asked.

She hesitated and then slowly shook her head. “N-no it… it feels r-really good, it’s just—y-you’re so close a-and it feels so good, and—“

He smiled a little bit, understanding her fears. He leaned up to peck her lips between her palms. “There’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” he confessed softly. “You’re beautiful, Marcia.”

She smiled, hands still covering her eyes. “O-okay… Okay you can continue,” she breathed.

He grinned at the thought and leaned back down between her legs.

Here he could smell her arousal as well as see its wetness. He couldn’t quite describe it though—he’d never smelled anything like it. Sweaty, yes. But also warm. Wet. And somehow, inherently like her.

He breathed it in, and nervously started to kiss at her thigh. Her leg trembled against his hand, and if he looked, he would have seen her toes beginning to nervously curl. Still he kissed, letting his tongue trace the path of the 3DMG bruises. She moaned again, small, and so he licked more, until her moans matched the ones from before.

He hadn’t touched himself a bit, and yet he felt more than wound, at that fitful moment before the winding became too much and had to be let go. Just the sound of her lovely voice like this, it made his whole body taught with something he’d never really felt before, not this way—need.

“Marcia,” he murmured softly as he kissed along her other thigh, making her knees above him tremble. “Can I take your underwear off?”

She gasped a little bit, though from the question or his kisses, he couldn’t tell. After only a moment, she finally whispered, “Yes.”

He hesitated, but not for long. He wanted this now more than anything. Nerves couldn’t hold him back. And the way she smiled at him proved that she too was ready and willing. He sat up and took the edges of her underwear in both hands. She helped as he slid them down, lifting her hips and then her knees. As he pulled them off completely, letting them drop to the floor along with the rest of her nightclothes and his, he gently caught her ankle in one hand and kissed it, along with her toes.

She giggled and wriggled her toes at him. “Jean, you’re so weird,” she teased.

He merely smiled at the words. His lips trailed up her legs, little pecks up her shin and on her knee until he’d made his way up her thighs and was face to face with her wetness.

She bit her lip as she looked down at him. He seemed surprised, or maybe mesmerized. Truth be told, Jean didn’t know how he felt. The winding inside him was at breaking point as he studied the pink skin beneath her legs. It was different seeing it in real life—seeing it on her—than it had been watching the slide show Shadis had prepared for them to aid his explanations.

Jean’s mouth felt dry as he licked his lips, trying to figure out where to start. But looking up at her and seeing her smile made him more sure again. He ducked his head and took a deep breath full of the scent of her skin and her arousal. Deciding to start the way he had started all of this—with gentle kisses—he leaned in and let his lips become wet with her slick.

The taste of it was best described as heady, and although Jean did think about it as he started to lick, feeling her legs coil on either side of his head, his head was filled more with the feeling of her hand reaching down to clasp his. They held tightly to each other, feeling the wound string beneath each other’s skin.

He wasn’t able to kiss her there as long as he wanted to, because he could feel her coil beginning to snap. She moaned loudly enough that she had to bring one of her hands up to cover her lips. Yet it did nothing to cover the sound or lower it.

Soon, her legs were twitching around his head, and she practically begged for him to stop, before she exploded. He popped up, lips shining with her wetness, and as she took a moment to breathe, he asked her if he’d done something wrong.

She laughed a little and shook her head at him. “No,” she whispered. “Nowhere near.”

She waved her hands at him, and he crawled up the length of her body, until they were pressed together the way they had been at first. Their faces were so close to each other, chests pressed tight together. She reached up with her free hand to brush his sweaty bangs back from his face, eyes studying his. He loved when her eyes looked this way—squinted with the wideness of her smile, and sparkling with love.

He kissed her again, loving the feeling of her lips against his. She was surprised to taste herself on his tongue, and yet she couldn’t stop herself from kissing him back either. She pulled back after a moment, her lips glistening now as well as she whispered, “It felt so good,” she murmured. “I didn’t want to stop before we got to…” She blushed and smiled. “You know…”

He nodded, pecking her lips again, quickly and softly. She smiled wider, pressing their foreheads together. “I think I’m ready,” she whispered.

His heart stopped and then started to run harder than before. He could hear it in his ears. But he grinned. He was ready too. He wanted to feel it, that closeness he heard people talk about. And he wanted to feel it with her.

Though he hesitated just the slightest bit as he pulled off his boxers, they came off quickly. She looked down between them as he situated himself between her legs, and her eyes went wide. “O-oh,” she breathed, her legs pressing him a little bit closer.

Worry rushed through him, but her blush soothed him. “It’s bigger than I thought,” she murmured.

The words made him blush too. He ducked his head, pressing their foreheads together again. They laughed softly, warm smiles that made the tension melt away. Wrapping her legs around him, Marcia whispered that it was okay to start now.

The first push was hard. Marcia whimpered a bit, and Jean stopped to make sure she was okay. Only when she nodded and hugged him close did he try again. The second push was easier, but still nervous about hurting her, he didn’t quite push hard enough. It wasn’t until the third push that he finally slid inside.

She let out another whimper, this one louder, while Jean let out a loud moan.

His head spun, and his whole body tingled. She was so hot around him, the wetness overwhelming. And the tightness too made him want to cry with pleasure. His winding was at its end, and any moment now he’d surely snap.

Her hands trembled as they cupped his face and brought him down to kiss her. But that was enough. To soothe them both and make it easier. When she breathed for him to move, he began to move. When she gasped for more, he gave her more.

He felt closer to her than he had before. Something about the way their bodies fit together felt so natural. Their heartbeats seemed to match.

He tried hard not to move the wrong way. He stopped every time she winced and only kept going when she asked him to. It was hard to find the perfect rhythm, the perfect way to move. But when he finally found it, they didn’t last long.

Marcia’s hand took Jean’s again, tightly. Her nails dug crescent moon marks between the bones of his hand. She let out little high-pitched pants now, eyes shut tight and legs just as tight around his waist. Jean could again feel the coil. In the pit of his own stomach as well as in the curve of her palms.

Hers snapped first. She spasmed beneath him, gasping out his name. Her back arched, her hips rolled. Suddenly she felt so tight around him that it was almost enough to hurt. Her hand tightened in his, squeezing until his fingers felt numb. And then it was over, just as quickly as her whole body tightened, it loosened beneath him. Her hand fell limp, and her eyes went hazy, a dull smile starting to light up her full lips.

Jean’s coil snapped then, realizing that he was the one who’d given her that smile, made her eyes daze that way. His hips snapped against hers as he tightened one last time, his forehead dropping to the table beside her. “Oh fuck,” he breathed.

She laughed, and he tightened more, gasping for air. She shivered at the feeling of new warmth filling her up and smiled, her hand absently rubbing the back of Jean’s head.

A few minutes later, they still lay together. Jean was soft now, and she was drying, but still they glowed. He sat up a bit to see her eyes closed, her lips parted only slightly as she breathed. “Marcia?” he whispered.

She smiled, opening her eyes a slit. “Yes?” she whispered, reaching up to run her fingers through his hair. Her nails scratched at the back of his head, where the hair was shaved close to the skull.

He smiled down at her as well. “I love you.”

She smiled wider and leaned up to peck his lips. “I love you too.”

He rolled off of her, reaching down to pick up her shirt and his. He draped both over them, kissing at her cheeks. She was clearly tired. Her eyes were hazy with sleep now. But even so, she still mustered the energy to lift her head, flip her hair so that he could lay his head on top of it as well.

Nestled in the curls together, they laughed one more time and kissed one more time. So soft and warm. Soon she fell fast asleep, but Jean couldn’t sleep yet.

He watched her peaceful face and felt peaceful himself. “One day,” he whispered softly, reaching to pull her body against his, “I’m going to marry you.”

And when he finally fell asleep, he dreamt of the future where he did.

**Author's Note:**

> I was answering asks about Fem! Marco headcanons? And then a friend of mine was like "okay but canonverse fem Marco" except IT HAD A SAD ENDING so I was like no we're going to do the happy, fluffy, smutty times. I think this is a little less clumsy than it should be orz, please forgive me. Anyway the title comes from the song Holy Ghost by BØRNS, which is like my fave song from him and I listened to it exclusively when writing this lol XDD It's so them tbh!
> 
> (Also yes this is unprotected because I think given their situation they wouldn't have access to protection BUT PLEASE ALWAYS USE PROTECTION UNLESS YOU WANT BABIES OR STDS OKAY?)
> 
> Anyway, if you like this, please leave a kudos and a comment! And if you want to see more of my writing, feel free to check out my writing sideblog novelistangel!


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